Hey Subscriber First Name,

I was walking with Muggins the other day when they exploded angrily at a passing truck. My heart sank as I thought about how we could avoid the next one.

Later, I heard Muggins go from peacefully watching out the window to frantically running back-and-forth between the back and front of the house, trying to see where a strange cat had wandered. My heart ached as I wondered how I could prove to Muggins that the cat won’t hurt us.

In the evening, I watched Muggins flinch and lift their head as they said “no” to another ear cleaning. My heart cried as I searched my mind for a way forward.

When I saw Muggins in each of those situations, all I wanted was to help them feel calmer so they could enjoy our walk, safer so their favorite pastime wouldn’t be interrupted, and more comfortable so they could receive the best care possible.

I know that you want the same for your dog, too.

That’s why I wrote the Co-Regulation with Dogs workbook. Co-regulation isn’t just a buzzword or trendy breathing exercise.

Co-Regulation is an embodied, shared practice of feeling feelings, expressing feelings, and caring for feelings.

It’s a strategy to find a sense of safety, to increase comfort, and (when necessary) to calm down.

My stories above didn’t end at the explosion, panic, or hygiene care avoidance. I certainly felt discouraged, overwhelmed, and distressed.

I’ve even felt frustrated, resentful, and helpless at times.

On my worst days, those feelings have festered into self-doubt, heartbreak, and a belief that I’m failing as a dog guardian.

But then Muggins comes along and reminds me that we’re in this together.

With co-regulation, it’s okay for me to feel all those feelings. It’s also okay to share my difficult feelings with others - more than okay, it’s recommended!

Because when I acknowledge what I feel, I can care for those feelings, and then I can show up for Muggins and help them feel safer, calmer, and more comfortable.