Image shows a human donning lavender and moons dust while seated in prayer position. A black-and-white dog peacefully chews on an adjacent mat.
 

Co-Regulation Coaching

A 1:1, 6-session, program to help you regulate your nervous system while reducing reactive, anxious or aggressive behavior in your dog.

All coaching services begin with a FREE 30-minute virtual Affinity Call so we can see if we’re a good fit for doing this work together before you spend a penny.

Co-Regulation Coaching is offered on a tiered, class-equitable, pay-what-supports-you pricing scale.

Learn more here.

Imagine settling onto your couch, the pillows are set up just right, and a bowl of your yummiest safe food is on the coffee table. Your dog is peacefully busy with their enrichment toy, and you’re so excited to binge your favorite show. All of a sudden, a FedEx truck rolls by. Your dog stops what they’re doing, lets out a booming alarm bark while running to the window, and…

…You calmly get up and walk over to your dog with a piece of cheese (because you brought a baggie of cheese to the couch because you’re a freaking genius at anticipating your dog’s needs while also meeting your own!) Your dog eats the cheese, then they look at you, you give them another piece, they eat it and look at you, and you repeat this for 2 minutes until the FedEx truck is gone. And then your dog goes back to their toy and you go back to your comfy cozy situation, and life is good.  

End scene.

Now, you’re probably thinking, “That was a nice trip down fantasy lane but that would never happen in real life no matter how much cheese I have in my pocket! And I would never remember to cut up the cheese ahead of time, let alone bring it to the couch! And what kind of person knows when the FedEx truck is gonna come by?! Plus my dog would never even eat in that situation because they’re so picky! And my dog just goes nuts and I’ve already tried everything and there’s nothing I can do!”

If you’re thinking all that, then your nervous system is already in a fight-flight response. And that makes sense because you’ve experienced super stressful situations like this so many times with your dog. And your nervous system is more sensitive than a neurotypical person’s, so your dog’s reactions feel scarier and so much more intense.

So, before you read any further, I want you to stop and take a few breaths.

Breathe in through your nose.

Hold for 2 counts.

Breathe out through your mouth.

Hold for 2 counts.

Breathe in.

Hold.

Breathe out.

Okay, let’s continue.

I want you to know that you’re not alone.

I know what you’re going through because I have been there. I also believed for a long time that there was nothing I could do. I believed that because I didn’t have the support I needed.

I didn’t have the support I needed because I had internalized the belief that my needs are “too much” and that I’m “too sensitive”. I had been saying things to myself like, “I should be able to do this on my own” or “I shouldn’t be this upset about my dog’s behavior” or “I should be able to get past this by now” or “I shouldn’t pay someone to help me if I can’t be consistent with the homework” or “I keep yelling at my dog, I don’t even deserve support!”

All of those “shoulds” are bullshit.

Your needs are valid.

You deserve support.

It’s okay if you can’t be consistent. (No human can be perfectly consistent, not even neurotypical people!)

And there is absolutely no timeline for how fast anyone or any dog transforms reactive behavior. There is no trophy for doing it the fastest, and anyone who tells you that they can do it fast is probably using a shock collar.

We don’t do shock collars here! (We don’t do punishment at all – not with our dogs, and definitely not with ourselves!)

We don’t do “shoulds”.

We don’t do bullshit neuronormativity.

And we sure AF don’t do anything on our own!

Now, keep reading below to learn how Co-Regulation Coaching is going to transform your relationship with your dog from a draining hot mess of stress and anxiety into a nourishing sweet salve that helps you live your best life.

You can do this.

Your dog believes in you, and so do I!

Over 6, 60-min sessions we’ll collaborate to cultivate a supportive sensory diet and a toolbox of practical strategies so you can:

  • look forward to walks with your dog because you both feel safe

  • feel empowered and capable when handling your dog around other humans and animals

  • engage in fun activities that expel your dog’s energy without depleting yours

  • anticipate your dog’s needs and know exactly how to meet them

  • invite friends over without days of post-visit ruminating thoughts about how poorly your dog behaved

  • respond to your dog’s reactions with calm and confidence

  • connect better with friends, family, and neighbors even when your dog is involved

  • get better rest because you know how to prevent big reactions and help your dog relax

Here’s how you’ll get there:

 

1

You’ll learn 3 nervous system states and the Yes-No Spectrum for Behavior so you can understand exactly why your dog has big reactions and why your nervous system responds with anxiety and overwhelm.

2

You’ll explore 9 nonverbal nervous system cues in both humans and dogs so that you can listen better to your own body and improve understanding of your dog’s communication.

3

You’ll learn Sensory Budgeting and the Sensory Overload Volcano framework so you can reduce exposure to draining sensations, increase exposure to nourishing sensations, and prevent big explosive reactions in both yourself and your dog.

 

4

You’ll learn Leslie McDevitt’s Pattern Games to give you simple, repetitive, structured movement exercises to easily move past triggers on walks, diffuse big reactions at home, help others interact with your dog, and safely navigate unexpected situations.

5

You’ll build skills for practicing Cooperative Care to help your dog feel safe during hygiene tasks and veterinary visits, while giving your dog the care they need in a way that doesn’t feel stressful.

6

You’ll learn somatic (body-based) strategies so you can process difficult feelings, avoid getting stuck in draining negative thought patterns, preserve your energy, and show up for your dog the way you want to.

Co-Regulation Coaching graduates say…

  • Celi & Walter

    I've been on a personal journey with my nervous system and Sharon taught me how that applies to Walter and his skills, I would of never had imagined there were so many similarities. This has allowed me to have a deeper relationship with my dog. I'm so thankful to Sharon's gentleness and expertise.

  • Ashley & Ringo

    The work that we’ve done together has totally changed my relationship with my dog and how we work together. I was feeling so overwhelmed and like I had no control over Ringo. He had so much energy, I constantly felt guilty, had no idea how to “exhaust” him, and make him happy. I didn’t know how to give him his best life while also taking care of my own mental health and well-being.

    When we started working on this, I felt a shift right away! Ringo needed more structure for his happiness and it allowed me to take time to myself. Now, when we lay next to each other, we can each take a deep breath and help each decompress. It’s amazing the positive effect we have on one another when we’re regulated and in sync. When both of our needs are met. When we play together it’s enriching and engaging, rather than exhausting.

    I’ve found I have so much more peace in my life now that I know how to co-regulate with him. The two of us are better than ever!! He knows how to listen to me and I know how to listen to him. I can genuinely say that we are helping each other live our best lives thanks to Sharon.

  • Sarah, Ziggy & Leia

    Sharon has a cutting-edge, unique perspective to dog training. I loved her application of attachment science (i.e. how we co-regulate, etc) to our relationships with our dogs. It's made a huge impact on my daily life with my dogs.

    For example, my dogs used to get up frequently in the middle of the night, and previously I had tried things like exercising them more, etc; however, the issue persisted even though they are well past puppyhood. However, doing things that focused on co-regulating like tuning into what they might be needing in a moment, focusing on regulating myself and my nervous system, and generally showing up more for them relationally has been incredibly impactful.

    They do not wake me up in the middle of the night anymore! It's amazing. They also are generally more settled throughout the day. I've tried SO MANY things for dog training, and Sharon's techniques were the most effective by far. The best part is that I feel like my dogs are less anxious and more content in their life, AND we live together in a more harmonious way! Win-win all around!

  • Becca & Broccoli

    “[Our friend] arrived today and Broccoli did incredible! I am so damn proud of him. I used everything you taught us in the lessons and everyone listened to my directions and instructions, and I used what I learned from the workbook I tested, too, to ensure that everything I needed to say, “yes” was in place. I asked for extra time to prepare and I kept myself calm leading up to them arriving which in turn meant that Broccoli stayed calm too. I gave him and I a lil pep talk throughout the morning too. I kept my focus entirely on him and moved completely at his pace.

    I knew we had it in us and your guidance and support has been hugely helpful to getting us here.

  • Yejin, Nico & Mandu

    Feeding is definitely better. It has been helpful to feed on plastic plates that don’t make as much noise. Mandu is more frequently asking for things. I feel like we’re pretty good now at knowing when he’s asking for food. He’s been asking for pets more! He’s been hanging outside with us. It’s been great! He even will hang out with us while we watch TV, and there was so much anxiety around that before [because of the sound]. All the things that used to be the initial triggers for an anxious episode just aren’t a thing anymore. That thing where he was getting anxious around lunchtime is gone for good, and we’re all less frustrated.

  • Michelle & Milo

    My daughters and I really enjoyed working with Sharon. Our dog Milo is a really good boy but there were some areas where there were some behavioural concerns; namely biting when seeking attention and jumping when he wanted to greet dogs / humans. Sharon helped us understand the relationship between our own nervous system states and Milo’s, and helped us to communicate with each other better and set healthy boundaries.

    She was able to offer advice on training that helped immensely and really flipped the switch on annoyances that have become sources of joy for our family. Our sessions felt like doggie therapy. She is someone I can talk to about what is going on with my dog and she listens and provides helpful feedback which was invaluable coming from someone with so much knowledge and experience.

    Every issue I wanted to work on when we began working together is now resolved. Training is a work in progress but, where I once felt hopeless, I feel hopeful. I’ve seen such positive changes in the areas I felt needed improving and Sharon was instrumental in getting us there. She also helped me to see things from Milo’s perspective which has deepened our relationship and really brought us into a state of co-regulation. I cannot endorse Sharon enough. I would work with her again in a heartbeat!

  • Alyssa, Bodhi & Mars

    From learning his different arousal states to practicing consent, it became more about really learning and understanding my dog and his needs. In turn, it allowed me to be able to respond in a way that produced positive results rather than me getting frustrated as to why he won’t do what he’s told. Sharon has helped us develop a healthier relationship with our animals and for that we are grateful.

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About the Program

  • Who is this for?

    This program is for you if you:

    • long to stop having meltdowns in response to your dog’s behavior

    • are ready to learn how to regulate your nervous system so you can how up fully for your dog(s)

    • desire to have conversations with your dog(s), rather than communicate with commands

    • want to broaden your consent and deep listening practices to include your dog(s)

    • want to live the values of consent, reciprocity, responsibility, and renewal with your dog(s)

    • long for a way of being in the world that prioritizes relationships

    • are ready to slow down your lifestyle and know your dog(s) can teach you how

  • When would I need this?

    This program is ideal for when you:

    • experience increased stress, anxiety, isolation, or overwhelm as a result of your dog’s behavior

    • experience disruptions in your daily routine, meaningful activities, or social interactions because of your dog’s behavior

    • recently experienced a significantly stressful or life-changing event that impacts your relationship with your dog

    • live with a dog(s) who behaves with hyperactivity, anxiety, impulsivity, reactivity, or who has bitten and you want to help them (and yourself) feel safe

    • live with a dog(s) who does not get along with another animal in your home

    • live with a dog(s) who experienced a significantly stressful event that has resulted in changed behavior

    • recently adopted a dog who needs support adjusting to your environment or learning basic skills for walking, socializing, hygiene care, etc

    • recently adopted a dog for emotional support

    • recently adopted a dog for your Autistic child

    • live with an assistance dog who recently experienced a significant stress or traumatic event that is impacting their ability to work

  • What frameworks are used?

    This program draws from the following frameworks:

    • humane, force-free, and consent-based canine obedience and behavior modification

    • canine cooperative care & training

    • Polyvagal theory

    • occupational therapy

    • sensory integration

    • somatic consent

    • decolonizing nonviolent communication

    • neuroscience of human-animal interactions

  • What methods are used?

    These are some techniques we may use:

    • positive reinforcement to help your dog learn skills for waiting; greeting humans + dogs; asking for food, outside time, or play; or spending time alone

    • nervous system mapping to understand how the environment impacts your or your dog’s arousal

    • sensory budgeting & building a sensory diet to support stress management and reduce sensory overload

    • desensitization and counter conditioning for your limiting beliefs and your dog’s environmental triggers

    • guided movement and breathing

    • playful exploration of human-dog interactions

    • planning for how to practice or implement learned skills

    • problem solving to navigate challenging situations and help you incorporate learned skills into your lifestyle

    • Leslie McDevitt’s Pattern Games to provide you and your dog with nourishing sensory input and coping strategies to navigate reactivity-inducing situations

Book Now

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View fullsize I used to feel like my nervous system was in charge and I was just along for the ride. I would see myself reacting to Muggins’s behavior with frustration or anger. Afterward, I would feel overwhelmed with shame and guilt. I knew all the dog tra
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Through investing in yourself and your dog, you will receive a recording of each session, worksheets to guide you in listening to your body and understanding your dog's body language, links to video tutorials, and text support to ask questions and receive encouragement between sessions.

Ultimately, a lifestyle shift that transforms your relationship with your dog from a hot mess of stress and anxiety to a nourishing sweet salve that helps you live your best life!

 

FAQs

  • Please see my pricing page to learn about my income-based sliding scale.

  • I use a combination of humane, force-free, and positive reinforcement methods. I do not use punishment in any form. Some specific methods I use include:

  • All coaching and grief guidance services begin with a 30-minute virtual Affinity Call.

    During this call, we will discuss:

    • your goals/expectations to ensure that they’re realistic, specific, and can be accomplished through the services that I provide

    • any questions you have about my philosophy or process

    • why you want to do this work

    During this call, we will NOT discuss:

    • what I think of your dog’s behavior

    • advice for how to change or manage your dog’s behavior

    You can schedule your Affinity Call here.

  • Yes! Working together requires that we establish an agreement that clearly defines goals, expectations, and the logistics of our work. Intake paperwork also includes assessments to measure your quality of life, your dog’s sensory processing patterns, and an objective measure of your dog’s behavior.

    Paperwork includes:

  • Most of my work is conducted virtually, via Zoom. You will access our sessions via a cell phone, tablet, or computer from the comfort of your own home.

    I find virtual coaching and consultations to be beneficial for a variety of reasons, including:

    • accessibility for humans who live in rural areas or at far distances from me

    • accessibility for humans experiencing chronic fatigue; post-traumatic stress; sensory processing differences; difficulties with attention and memory; or limited space inside the home

    • ensuring that the focus of our work is on building YOUR skills and enhancing YOUR relationship with your dog

    • minimizing stress on dogs who display fear and anxiety around unfamiliar humans

    • less stress on my sensory system, which allows for me to use the full capacity of my clinical reasoning, communication, and empathic skills

  • Yes. I will meet with you inside your home when:

    • you live within 30 miles of me (in the Albany, NY greater capital region)

    • it is not possible to effectively evaluate your dog’s behavior via virtual consultation

    • technological, physical, cognitive, or sensory limitations prevent you from otherwise accessing this work

    In-home visits incur a travel fee. This fee is the same rate as your regular pricing tier, prorated for the amount of time it takes me to travel to your home and back. See pricing tiers here.

  • When I interact with your dog, I am gathering information on only 2 things: how your dog interacts with an unfamiliar human, and how your dog behaves when an unfamiliar human is in their home. This information may or may not be useful to understanding the issue for which you are coming to me for support.

    In order to truly understand your dog’s behavior, it is necessary to gather information in a variety of ways, using a variety of methods, including:

    • interviewing you and your family, and reviewing your answers on a questionnaire

    • using standardized assessment tools and questionnaires

    • observing videos* of your dog’s behavior in different environments

    • observing your structured or unstructured interactions with your dog during virtual sessions

    • interviewing other humans who know your dog, including your veterinarian, dog walker, other dog health or behavior professionals you have worked with, daycare staff, and groomer

    *When the behaviors in question involve aggression or anxiety, I will not review videos in which you specifically prompt your dog to behave in these ways just so I can see it. Aggression and anxious behaviors result out of stress to your dog, and there is no reason to cause stress to your dog just so I can see their response. If you have security camera footage or doorbell recording device footage, or happened to capture a behavior organically, then we can review that. But we will not purposely stress your dog to record their behavior.

  • Each coaching session is 60 minutes.

  • During each coaching session, we will begin by defining our goals for the session. This is often determined by you and whatever is a priority for your day or week. If you are not sure about the priority for the session, I will help you define this. From there, we choose a path depending on your needs, which may include:

    • processing a difficult situation by sharing what happened and using somatic (body-based) strategies to move through difficult feelings

    • problem solving a situation to identify how you can adjust the environment, communicate something to your dog, set a boundary, care for yourself or your dog differently, meet your and your dog’s needs better

    • build knowledge and skills in self-awareness, sensory processing, somatic consent, boundary setting, nervous system health, understanding dog communication

    • build skills and practice exercises with your dog (I will help you understand an exercise, set up your environment and camera, and then will observe you while you work with your dog so that I can tell you what you’re doing well, identify challenge areas, and help you make adjustments

    • build skills and practice exercises to help you budget your sensory needs, care for your needs, and manage stress

    • plan for how to incorporate learned knowledge and skills into your daily routine

  • Yes! This work requires that you dedicate time each day to building your awareness, knowledge, and skills. This work requires attention to your needs, your dog’s needs, and the relationship you are building together.

    Sessions are designed for building knowledge and skills, understanding patterns of behavior, problem solving, and planning for how to incorporate learned knowledge and skills into your daily routine.

    Homework is designed to help you build awareness of yourself and your dog, and to practice skills for yourself or with your dog that we learned in session.

    You will not make progress without bringing this work into your everyday life between sessions.

  • I accept payments via:

    • Venmo

    • PayPal

    • Apple Pay

    • Zelle

    • Cash App

    • credit card (through my website)